Monday, 23rd April, 2018

Delhi Metro to deploy fart source detectors in metro coaches

10, Sep 2014 By Akash

New Delhi: If Faking News’s reliable source are to be believed, then there is a good news coming for the commuters of Delhi Metro.  It seems as if DMRC officials have finally taken cognizance of increasing complaints from daily travelers.

DMRC had received many complaints about the discomfort and suffocation caused by “farts” in fully packed metro coaches. Complain register is full of such complains. DMRC has decided to deploy “Fart Source Detectors” recently lunched by Apple under the name of “iFart”.

Achhe din.

Explaining its working, an official of Delhi Metro said, “Each coach will have a FSD-iFart. As soon as some one farts he will be located by this device and information will be sent to main server of DMRC. That guy will be detained on the very next station and will be sent to loo or will be given a dose by Kayam Churn.”

Lot of positive reactions are coming in by Delhiites. Dhaniram said, “We have never expected that DMRC will act so fast on our complaints and will give us a comfort ride. “

Rita said, “Smelling underarms and ‘Chameli Ka Tail’ are not enough that people shamelessly started farting in full packed metro. I am happy that DMRC has solved fart issue. I hope soon they will act on other issues  like ‘Chameli oil’ and ‘underarm smell’ also.”

As everyone is praising this in the city, our aam aadmi Mr. Kejriwal has openly threatened to go on “Dharna” against these FSDs.

He said, “From the very first day this government is curbing individual freedom of aam aadmi. Farting is a birth right of a common man and we won’t let this corrupt government to attack on their personal freedom.”

It has  been reported that some enthusiastic  supporters of AAP gathered outside the DMRC office and farted continuously without any break to oppose this decision by DMRC.

Meanwhile, DMRC said that we are very strong and confident about these FSDs and no one can stop us from deploying them.

Taking cue from DMRC, other metro corporations of Jaipur, Bengaluru and Hyderabad have also started process of deploying these “FSDs”.