Monday, 26th June, 2017

Delhi autowallahs to finance Ahmedabad-Mumbai Bullet Train project

07, Sep 2014 By Ashish Chauhan

Delhi. In what can be termed as unprecendent and exceptional move, Delhi Auto Union decided to donate their one day income to finance Narendra Modi’s dream of Bullet train corridor.

The move came as surprise after Modi’s Japan tour where Japan and India signed a deal on the finance of Bullet train corridor.

In a press brief, the Union president Pappu Tyrewala told the media, “After listening Modi’s speech from Red Fort, we all have decided to help Modi ji’s dream of Bullet Train with our small contribution.”

Money minting machine.
Money minting machine.

“We will donate our one day income to finance Modi’s dream project,” he added. “We know it sounds impossible that we, Delhi autowallahs can even donate money. We are infamous as our metres but Modi ji’s speech made us to take the decision unanimously.”

The move had a weired impact on Delhiites. At many places, people were found pinching themselves and at other places couples were found pinching each other.

A DU student, Anjali, who pinched herself thrice before speaking to Faking News said,”I yet can’t believe that these autowallahs can donate. They don’t even return me the change.” She pinched again and fainted.

“Yesterday I had a quarrel with an autowala who was not returning back change,”said a woman in a deep shock.

BJP welcomed the step and hailed the move as Hindu nationalism of autowallah’s in Khakhi dresscode and proposed to call them Hindu Autowallas.

Subramanayam Swamy proposed DNA test to check the amazing genealogy of autowallahs.

Arvind Kejriwal claimed that there is Corruption in the proposal,”We know autowallahs very well, they can not donate like this. Everyone knows them very well. They must have been forced by Adani Ambani. I also have proofs.” He left the press conference after 49 seconds. AAP issued a statement that Arvind Kejriwal will come back for full 5 hours conference later.

He was reportedly found working out new formula calculating fare between Ahmedabad and Mumbai worth 420 thousands. However details are yet to be confirmed.

Congress slammed the move and called it “Communally motivated” and “Against secular fabric of India” in a statement issued.

“This is the decision taken by Auto Union commitee which has unequal Muslim representation, this is a majoritarian decision.The govt. should take serious note of it and ensure minorities are protected and given equal representatio. This is like 2002 but this is not 2002 and Modi wants 2002 because it was 2002 which made modi 2002 hero.”Rahul Gandhi was busy with Chhota Bheem and was unavailable for a comment.

Mayawati welcomed the move but demanded donation exemptions for ST and SC autodrivers.

“Sahab, in one day we earn more from changes than the fare itself and if someone is new to Delhi, we earn as much as thrice we do during normal fares,” said an autowalla,”One day won’t let us starve.”

Meanwhile, economists are astounded by this announcement. “It is unquestionable that Delhi autowallahs are richest drivers in India but this is beyond my understanding. Anyway their single day contribution would surpass total money required for the project.”