Wednesday, 25th April, 2018

Bring Bangalore to Bundelkhand says Rahul Gandhi, ASI starts digging

31, Oct 2013 By mazakiyastrat

Rahul Gandhi sought to bring major relief to the Bundelkhand region in Uttar Pradesh, one of the poorest region in the country. He said while addressing a rally in Hamirpur “My father stressed on computer education and see where Bangalore is today. He came to me in a dream yesterday, he said ‘Bring Bangalore to Bundelkhand’. We will start the efforts right away.”

Rahul Gandhi
Visionary Rahul.

Unlit late, no one realized that Rahul Gandhi was being literal. This was pointed out only when Faking News reporter Bharat Bachao spotted an Archaeological Survey of India (ASI) team digging in the outskirts of Bangalore.

On being questioned they revealed that they had orders from their officials to dig around Bangalore and detach it from the mainland. An onsite manager reasoned that their metal detectors had indeed located metal deposits under Bangalore. “If nothing else, we might at least turn up with some precious earthenwares.”

It is to be noted that ASI recently carried out a highly successful excavation in Unnao, U.P., where they recovered some pieces of pottery from the Buddhist era. This was achieved within  a fortnight despite pressures of finding large quantities of gold and the effort is being lauded internationally.

The ASI managers, engineers and workers at the Bangalore site seemed positively upbeat about this new project. They were busy for any comments, but a source revealed that they were happy about their recent demand in important projects while just sometime back they used to have no work.

Archaeological Survey of India Additional Director-General D.R. Mani, told the Faking News team that they are not following anyone’s dreams. They are working on the suggestions of GSI and hope to achieve an even greater success this time. Our reporter Bharat Bachao was quick to point out that GSI refers to Gandhi Sonia of Italy.

A source close to the Gandhi family revealed that Rahul Gandhi had been watching Ramanand Sagar’s Ramayan without break for the last few days. There are fears that he was inspired by Hanuman bringing back the whole mountain when he could not find the Sanjeevani booti (a life saving herb).

These efforts have caused a rift between software engineers in Bangalore.  One group is staging protests to stop the move, another group of software engineers are instead celebrating the fact that they will be closer to home once Bangalore is moved to Bundelkhand.

Experts say that this is a strategic move by Congress just before the elections and having a Congress state government will facilitate the move. The fact that Uttar Pradesh sends as many as 80 MPs to the 545 seat Lok Sabha may explain why Congress is completely disregarding the protests in the South and instead working to appease the voter base in Uttar Pradesh.