Sunday, 18th February, 2018

Asaram’s spokesperson rubbishes media reports, claims it was the hand of god and not the godman’s

23, Aug 2013 By Myopic Visionary

As the news of self-styled spiritual guru Asaram Bapu’s sexual assault on a 16-year old minor went viral in the media, reactions have started pouring in from various parts of the country.

An agitated women rights activist, Sarla Devi speaking to us from Jodhpur said, “He calls himself Bapu and indulges in sexual molestation of minor girls! Shame on him.”

Another rights group member, Pravin Shukla said, “His name should be changed from Asaram Bapu to Be-sharam Bapu.”

The political bandwagon in the capital has also taken up the issue quite vociferously. Our correspondent covering the proceedings at the Lok Sabha added, “MPs of the ruling UPA got down to the well of the house shouting slogans against Asaram Bapu and pointed fingers at the BJP for safeguarding such godmen. In response, the BJP spokesperson has said that it is just a political ploy of the UPA to divert the country’s attention from the Coalgate scam.”

Another heavyweight, self-styled spiritual guru, Nirmal Baba has commented, “Asaram Bapu must have had samosa with red chutney that morning. If he had samosa with green chutney, then such a negative publicity would never had happened with him, in the first place. I sympathize with him for his predicament.”

In the meantime, a spokesperson of Asaram Bapu has come up with an official statement in his defense, while condemning the media to play into the hands of the guru’s enemies, “This is quite a shocking revelation. It seems that the media is playing into the hands of Bapu’s enemies who are up on arms to malign his image, once and for all. Bapu is a godman, a person representing the divine being in this human form. Before the water gets murkier, the media should first try to find out whose hand it was – Bapu’s or Gods, for the godman is just a manifestation of the god himself.”

And whenever Kanha or Krishna takes over his physical demeanor, he tends to act naughty with his gopis. The girl should have felt proud of the incident rather than over-react and complain of sexual assault.”

Faking News tried to get a response from Paresh Rawal, who had filed a legal case against God, questioning his very existence, in a recent Bollywood movie, OMG (Oh My God). Unfortunately, he was not available for any comments.