Sunday, 18th March, 2018

After Reservation in promotions, comes Reservation in scams

11, Sep 2012 By Jhoota Journo

After passing the bill for reservation in promotions for government jobs, the government is all set to roll out a similar bill for reservation in scams.

Sources within the Union Ministry of Scams told Faking News that they are planning to pass the bill according to which 8% and 15% of the total scam worth in a fiscal year would be allocated to SC and ST ministers respectively. This, they say, will be instrumental in bringing about equality in the field of scams.

As expected, this bill has found support from the opposition as well. The leader of the opposition, Mrs.Swaraj, said, “This monsoon session of the Parliament has been gloomy. But this bill is the silver lining in the dark cloud. This bill is probably the only good thing that the government has done in the past 8 years. We welcome the bill whole heartedly. We would allow the parliament to function so that the bill could be passed. Once that is done, we would go back to our ‘stalling the parliament’ ways.

But this bill also had its fair share of criticism as well, especially from Ministers not coming under the SC/ST band. One such Minister, Sapil Kibal, was quoted saying, “This bill is ridiculous. The only thing that this bill would do is bring down the quality of the scams. I, being an expert scamster myself, do realize that it is not easy to hoodwink people. And the last thing you want is an MP being given the right to scam because of the bill and he goofing up. This would bring a bad name to the holy sanctum of Ministry of Scams.”

The Union Minster of Scams, Mr.Raja, clarified saying, “I understand Mr.Kibal’s reservation against the reservation policy. So I would explain the bill more clearly. Only those MP’s meeting the eligibility criteria of hatching a scam worth anywhere between Rs.10 Crore to 100 Crore will be eligible to get a share in major scams. Basically, you don’t just plot a scam, you EARN it.” He giggled.

When asked about the anger that the public has developed against this reservation bill, Mr.Raja replied, “We never cared about the people when we scammed them. Why should we be bothered about them now?” He giggled again.