Monday, 23rd October, 2017

2 year old kid goes into depression after being friend-zoned by 11 months old neighborhood girl

04, Aug 2015 By Pagla Ghoda

Chhapra, Bihar: In a shocking case of soured love a 2 year old kid Sarvesh Sahastrabudhdhe a.ka. Chintu has apparently gone into post-breakup depression and has even stopped intake of his favorite chocolate flavored NaN milk. According to sources, Pinki Kapoor an 11 months old girl who stays in the house next door tied a friendship band on Chintu’s wrist on friendship day just before when he was planning to propose her to be his girlfriend, an unexpected happening which pushed Chintu into deep depression. He had even bought a beautiful proposal card for her and a bunch of roses, which now languish in his toy room untouched. Faking news talked to his mother Mrs. Sushila and enquired about his condition.

Faking News reporter: Morning ma’am

Mrs. Sushila: Namaskaar.

Reporter: Ma’am we heard about Chintu. What happened?

Sad Chintu
Sad Chintu upon receiving a Friendship-Band by Pinky, worrying if it would be followed by a Raakhi

Mrs. Sushila: I really don’t know, he has stopped eating, he is not even watching Chhota bheem or Doraemon or other cartoons which are his favorites, he just sits and looks at the ceiling fan and cries every few minutes. I think he is heart-broken. (*sobs*)

Reporter: But he is just a kid?

Mrs. Sushila: He is just a kid, but the girls these days, they are ruthless. They absolutely have no feelings. That kid Pinki, our Chintu admired her since she was born. When she was few months old he even used to give his portion of Cadbury gems to her, not knowing that she can’t even eat them without teeth. So deep is his love, but she outright rejected him, she tied a friendship band on his wrist. She did … what is that word …

Reporter: Friend-zoned?

Mrs. Sushila: Yes yes, friend-zoned my poor lad and now he just cries, immersed in her memories. (*sobs*)

Reporter: What are doctors saying?

Mrs. Sushila: Doctors have prescribed some anti-depressant tablets but unless he eats or drinks something how can he take this medication.

Reporter: That is pretty serious stuff.

Mrs. Sushila: Yes. Doctor also said that we should try to cheer him up, but if chocolates and cartoons don’t cheer up a kid what can we do? *sobs*

Reporter: What about that girl Pinki’s parents?

Mrs. Sushila: Oh they are actually accusing us, her papa rudely told Chintu’s papa “tera beta to meri beti pe dore daalta hai”, and stuff. Can you believe it? If anything happens to my kid, I am going to sue them for mental harassment.

Reporter: May be if he mingles with other kids …

Mrs. Sushila: Yes, I have called up my Kitty circle friend Narmada, she would be visiting us in the evening with her Kids. Her kids Pappu and Urmi are 2 year olds, they are much more mature and understanding than this kid Pinki. Perhaps if they talk to Chintu and have a kid-to-kid conversation, he will start to understand these bitter truths of life, better.

Reporter: Ok Mrs. Sushila, thanks a lot for talking to us, we hope Chintu get’s well soon.