Sunday, 25th June, 2017

This year instead of IPL, India to witness Political Premier League

29, Mar 2014 By sportstadkakk

With clouds over IPL7 after yesterday’s SC announcement, Indian audience needs some entertainment this summer and the number of political happenings going on every day and the leaders changing their political loyalties day in day out, it gives the feel of a T20 league.

Rahul Gandhi
Vice captain of team Congress.

What if the upcoming elections are considered as a Cricket League and our political parties as the Team Franchises? Let us have a look at each of the franchises and their key players.

Congress: This is the Oldest Franchise. This team has been around for a long time and its captain has always been from the same family. For the last 10 years, they have appointed an acting captain Mr. Manmohan Singh who follows the orders of the captain. The newest Captain Rahul (with no similarities to Rahul Dravid) Gandhi believes in Women empowerment and RTI. Nicknamed as ‘shehzada’ by the opposition, his sudden aggressiveness (tearing of the Duckworth Lewis system agreed upon by the acting captain) and low attendance on the ground has always been the talking point.

The fan following of this franchise has reduced rapidly because of the poor performances in the past few years. Also some of its key players have been accused and found guilty in Match fixing, Ball tampering, arguing with the umpire etc. and for these reasons they have been attacked by the other franchises and the commentators quite regularly. One prime commentator Arnab Goswami attacks one of their key players Sanjay Jha almost everyday. While Jha tries to explain the matter, he almost always falls short of any explanation. The commentator didn’t spare their captain and left him embarrassed after the interview.

The franchise is facing some problems before the tournament as most of their leaders have started migrating to other franchises which are looking stronger than them in the upcoming league. They have also been accused of copying some strategies from their arch rivals ‘BJP’ which they declared in their manifesto and one of their oldest players Digvijay Singh denied any ‘wave’ of their arch rival ‘BJP’ and said that their team will win it again. (While the commentators controlled theirs, we allow the readers to laugh at this remark).Their best fielder Salman Khurshid is supposed to be the most masculine ,agile and fit meanwhile comes up with new quarrel everyday and performs the role of David Warner.

BJP: This is the arch rival of Team Congress. With the change in Captain, this team looks very strong and is amongst the favorites and most probable to win the League. Their fan following has increased rapidly in the past year and their captain Modi is the favourite of the crowds. He is known to provide nicknames to the opposite Team captains such as ‘Shehzada’,’AK-49’ etc.

He bowls quite a lot of Yorkers and bouncers on the opposition and sometimes they find it impossible to duck. The selection of the new captain did break some old partnerships however and recently the team had to deal with some internal conflicts which has caused them some embarrassment and received a bashing from the commentators and the Coach situated in Nagpur. Some of the oldest players such as LK Advani and MM Joshi are rumored to be upset with the new team structure as they were not allowed to bat at their preferred position. Meanwhile, one of their senior players Jaswant Singh has decided to bat independently and has made himself available for the auction.

Aam Aadmi Party: This is the newest franchise and will be playing in the League for the first time. They performed pretty well in the Ranji matches and soon considered joining the league. As Ranji rules didn’t allow them to participate in the league their captain, coach, founder, mentor Kejriwal decided to leave the Ranji match after playing for 49 days as he  had lost the coin toss and blamed the other franchises for it.

Kejriwal is known to leave people behind. He first broke up the contract with his coach Anna Hazare.  Then he ran out Vinod Kumar Binny, one of their oldest players.‘AK-49’ as he is called by his contemporaries, has been the talking point of all the commentators and the pre and post match shows. While one of the commentators Punya Prasun Bajpai aka Krantikari has been accused of taking Arvind’s side even when he takes bad decisions on the field(reminds us of Ravi-Dhoni) much too often, there are some whom Arvind has blamed of ‘favouring’ the Modi led BJP team.

He doesn’t come on their talk shows and sends an empty chair. He’s been known for creating chaos off the field and has been found doing dharnas in front of the match referee’s house on several occasions. He doesn’t accept the umpire’s decision when he is given out and he claims that the BJP and Congress franchise have fixed the tournament in such a way that either of them wins it and no one else. While people believed in his theories earlier, it seems like Arvind is just preparing this tournament in such a way that he wins in the2019 version. Key players are Ashutosh (Commentator-turned-player), Kumar Vishwas (used to write spoof about Cricketers once), Prashant Bhushan (who runs out fellow players and gets out hit wicket much too often).

The Third Front: This franchise is formed just a few months before each league. They never declare their captain before the league and almost always perform poorly as a unit. Sometimes they don’t even seem to find 11 players to play at the same time which are compatible to play with each other, as there are always some internal issues in the team.

Some of their key players are: Mulayam Singh Yadav who is the captain of a State team and asks for pavilion seats for his fellow team player Azam Khan’s buffaloes. Mayawati who is Mulayam’s arch rival and has been known for making her own statues as the captain in front of the stadiums. Mamta Banerjee who was mentored by Arvind’s previous coach Anna Hazare for some time and who left her stranded when he saw less audience in the stadium, Nitish Kumar who was once a part of BJP franchise but left them after their change in captain and few others. This team doesn’t have a particular strategy in mind and they just want the prize money and thus there fan following isn’t quite high.