Monday, 21st August, 2017

Ten very easy tricks to lose weight

15, Jun 2014 By Siddharth Patki

Mumbai: Millions times you tried and billion times you failed to lose the weight. “Because you were doing it all wrong!!!” confirms a new scientific research.

As per Weight Loss Health Organization, here are the 10 & 100% effective ways to lose weight. of course, EASY TO DO

DO’s

  1. Ignore FAT people: It’s one of the prime reasons behind your body’s weight gain. Look around you 70% are fat, bad company results into bad habits. Just avoid them no matter how close you are to them. Result visibility: 20 days
  2. Drink plenty of ALCOHOL: Your body needs alcohol to function properly and to metabolize fat. So daily heavy dose of alcohol will work wonder for you as you will simply pass out without dinner. Taking an evening walk can easily get you to nearest bar. Result visibility: 15 days
  3. CHAIN Smoking: Normal smoking won’t do the trick. You need to be an exceptional chain smoker so that you can replace 50%  of food with smoke and you’ll feel stress-less too. Result visibility: 15 days
  4. Chase GIRLS: Whenever see a hot girl anywhere just run as fast as you can towards her. When you are just few feet away from her, turnaround and chase another girl, repeat this for 30 min. This most motivating workout for any man.Result visibility: 10 days
  5. Daily 3-4 hours sleep: Make friends with Nicotine, Caffeine and Ram Gopal Verma’s movies; they will keep you up all night. Result visibility: 10 days

DON’T’s:

  1. Karan Johar’s Films: They will leave you so frustrated that you & your girlfriend will end up eating more leading to more weight and the bill as well.
  2. Limit your visits to MOM:  You not have lost Weight neither you are getting skinny, her love for you is FATsious. And if you are living with your parents, you will never lose your weight.
  3. Dating: Stop dating! Dating is all about cappuccino with cream, chocolates, ice-creams, brownies etc. So just stop dating! Right now.
  4. Strict dieting: Salads, beans, pulses etc. diet will last 10 or max 20 day. Bingo!! You have lost 4 kg in 20 days which will result into a total RELAPSE in which you will gain 10 kg in 1 week, was all that really worth?, we don’t think so!!
  5. Avoid fruits: They are just costly, will leave you empty wallet.

There can also be other ways that can be used; such as getting married, break-up, getting actively involved in office politics.

“I lost 30 kg in 1 month, and the side effects very negligible, I drink too much, smoke too much, a bit disconnected with family but as fit as Hrithik Roshan,” said ecstatic user of these new tricks.