Saturday, 21st October, 2017

Shakespeare rises from grave to stop screening of Ram Leela

18, Nov 2013 By iamgreat

In a shocking tale of events renowned playwright Shakespeare recently arose from his grave to protest against the screening of Ram Leela. Fakingnews  was fortunate enough to get an interview with him.

Shakespeare writing his suicide note after watchin Ram Leela.
Shakespeare writing his suicide note after watching Ram Leela.

Reporter- So sir what brings you to India ?

Shakespeare -” Goliyon ki Rasleela Ram Leela”

Reporter (amused)- “You loved Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s work so much??”

Shakespeare- “It’s not about loving or hating.The guy just ruined my play Romeo & Juliet by adapting it in this movie.”

Reporter – “But sir I would like to point out. The movie said that it’s ‘inspired’ from Romeo & Juliet not ‘adapted’.”

Shakespeare-” Bitch please !! Anu Malik’s songs are also inspired not copied from old tunes.”

Reporter- “So how come all of a sudden you decided to revolt?”

Shakespeare-” You see a part of me died when the Punjabi film fraternity released this film called Jatt v/s Juliet & were brave enough to make a sequel of it too. But after hearing about this latest flick I couldn’t hold myself anymore. It’s like the whole nation is hellbent on conspiring against me. I am glad the bhojpuri film industry has spared me for for the time being.”

Reporter – “So why do you think Ram Leela tarnished Romeo &  Juliet?”

Shakespeare-Many reasons if you ask me.I will share some with you.

1) Romeo was clean shaved unlike Ranvir in the film.

2) Romeo & Juliet never had such extravagant sets. How the f**k does one justify peacocks in your swimming pool. I couldn’t afford rubber ducks in my bath tub during my days

3) I highly doubt whether the people of Verona, Italy would ever indulge in synchronized garba performances .

4) Romeo & Juliet used to send meaningful love letters to each other not lame SMS shayaris!!

Reporter- “Your message to Indian filmmakers.”

Shakespeare- “Make whatever you want to but don’t mess around with my plays for heavensake”

Faking news spoke to Sanjay Leela Bhansali regarding the controversy-

Sanjay Bhansali- Shakespeare should be glad I didn’t make Romeo do a towel dropping scene like I did in Saawariya!!

Faking news got a reaction from film critic Taran Adarsh too-

Reporter- “Sir how was Ram Leela?”

Taran Adarsh- “If you ask me ,it was poetry on celluloid”

Reporter- “Bitch please if Ram Leela was poetry on celluloid so was Chota Beem.”

Reporter- “What was the most exciting part of the film?”

Taran Adarsh- “Undoubtedly,the loo break.”