Monday, 19th February, 2018

Search for Real Men- SRK discovers he is one, promptly apologises

02, Jan 2013 By antidespondent

After the recent case in Delhi of an assault and protests over government’s lackadaisical attitude towards crime in general, the whole media entourage has joined the bandwagon of searching for ‘real men’. Focus has been completely taken off the usual celebrities who assume that the media is run on their star-power.

So confused were a few celebrities over the lost focus, that some of them considered that the media was indulging in surrogate promotion of them and their movies in their reports.

Balwan Khan, known for his star appeal amongst the front-seaters in single screen cinemas, the masses rather than the classes, the bus drivers, vegetable vendors, hand-cart pushers, auto-drivers, cleaners at gym, etc; thought the whole coverage over the case was stitched up to promote his movie Sab-Angg2. He considered that the media wanted to have a discussion about his band of fans, when they kept mentioning, words like ‘bus drivers, vegetable vendors, etc’. While the nation was gripped in outrage and was agitating over the incident, he came out giving a statement that “Women should be Sab-Angg“.

Afroz a fruit vendor, a die-hard fan of Balwan vehemently denied any cheap marketing gimmicks by his role model. “If Balwan bhai really had wanted to promote his film, then he would have said, ‘Women should be Sab-Angg2‘, as THAT is what is the name of his movie” he thundered.

Another Balwan fan, Ram Singh -a bus driver by profession and film trade-analyst on the fly – said, “The fact is Balwan bhai didn’t get any media focus, even a week before his film’s release, a crucial factor for the 100 cr-club lunacy. He was so desperate, he even used his time-tested trump card to grab some attention, by declaring he’l marry soon, but alas, search for this damned ‘real man’ ruined everything.”

Mukesh Singh his brother, quipped in,”It doesn’t matter, we all find there is a little bit of BHAI in us. We are inspired by his movies, always.”

Saarook R Khan discovers he is a real man

Even Saarook R Khan habituated by media to be discussed extensively, from 4 weeks before any of his film’s release, thought the whole focus on ‘real men’ was for him and a build-up to his next release in second week of January.

So sure was he, that the discussion was all about him and the nation was searching for him, when it spoke of search for ‘real men’, that he declared himself to be a ‘REAL MAN’. The first thing he did was to apologise for being a man.”I am sorry for being a man” he said, as he thought, that is what ‘real men’ were supposed to do.

Later, Sharan his ‘close’ friend defended him saying “Saarook’s apology has got nothing to do with his promotion of next film Mumbai Express, he has always been apologetic about it, although never publicly, but many times privately with me”

Amar Khan conspicuous by his absence

Meanwhile, interestingly Amar Khan was conspicuous by his absence. He was supposed to have a field-day for marketing one’s brand in such searches, especially after his ‘GaathiyaSev Khaate’ program . He only came out through a surrogate medium of his nephew ‘some-new Khan’, observing shock at the lack of real men. He must have taken a leaf out of Suresh Raina’s(not the cricketer) book.

Pratap Thackeray, a men’s rights activist from Nagpur, shed some light over his absence, “In reality, Amar Khan got his lessons learnt quickly after his ‘Gaathiya Sev Khaate’ program invited a boycott of his movie ‘Palaash’ and it resulted in a loss for his brand value, so he understands the money made over others distress, is not worth it in the long run”

Now the denial from Balwan’s fans and Saarook’s friend of trying to gain publicity over a tragedy, is due to an SOS from Amar or some sense dawning upon them, is anybody’s guess.

(by Amit Deshpande– @antidespondent from The Na-Real Times)