So the most awaited news of India has finally come! Yes, we are talking about the marriage of Katrina Kaif and Ranbir Kapoor which was announced lately by the later. They are all set to tie the knot by the end of 2016 he said to our reporter.
Our reporter Mr. Pandu congratulated him on successfully taking away Salman Khan’s girl and making her his girlfriend. Ranbir sarcastically told our reporter, “what’s so exciting in this? I had already romanced her in a Bollywood flick “AJAB PREM KI GAZAB KAHANI” back in 2009. Salman had threatened me on the sets of the movie to be courteous with my Bhabhi and not to touch her in an unpleasant way. I agreed to him at that time, but in my mind I had decided to snatch her away from him. He doesn’t have copyrights on girls of all generations or has he? He has been dating girls since 1980. I mean hadd dhoti hai yaar, Kuchh humarey liye bhi chhod do. Hum bhi line mein hain. I still remember the way Salman talked to me, I was perplexed, and people on the sets were looking at me like I was the spot boy there. I am a son of a father, who is a father of a son Rishi Kapoor. I am a goddam “Kapoor”! How can he threaten me like that? Believe me, if he hadn’t talked to me like that back in 2008 while shooting the film, I wouldn’t have pounced on his girlfriend. I was happy with my Deepika and I sometimes still regret cheating on her, but that’s okay as long as I am getting to do movies with her.”
Our reporter managed to ask a few questions to the great Sallu bhai.
Following is the transcript of the phone conversation between our reporter Pandu and Sallu
Pandu: Sir, How are you feeling after losing Katrina from your life?
Sallu: Come on man! It’s okay. Like, she was done with me and I was done with her so what was the point of being INhuman to each other.
Pandu: But sir, the world was thinking that she is the one made for you and you are going to marry her and settle down.
Sallu: No, bro! I am like the unsettled dust which will find place on your body even if you don’t want it.
Pandu: What actually went wrong in between you and Katrina?
Sallu: Pandu dude! Hadd mein Rehna mere Saath! Don’t try what you try doing with other celebrities, with me.
Pandu: Time out!
The conversation ended abruptly because of the foolish reporter who started talking like Imam Siddique the great casting director with 25 years of experience. We are sorry about that. We tried reaching Deepika for some comments, but she was busy fighting with Irfan Khan and taking care of his father trying hard to get emotion from his motion.
Katrina remained unavailable for the comments, perhaps she is planning a second trip with Ranbir to Spain and deciding what to wear other than Bikini so as to look good in the paparazzi.