Sunday, 23rd April, 2017

Narabali: Pakistan version of Bahubali

19, Aug 2015 By Kannan

Aggrieved by the response received by Fly-Man Rajmouli’s magnum opus – Bahubali, attache-de-culture of Pakistan, who goes by the gun-name Khatarnak has decided to make a movie that was aptly titled “Narabali”. According to the reports in the afternoon edition of dusk, mastermind of Mumbai attacks, Dr. Hafiz Sayeed was asked to weave the story. It appears that Hafiz wanted to act in the movie, but was persuaded against such an idea. “Even if we issue a fatwa to watch the movie, people would be bored as they go to movies to see someone else. After all, Hafiz was all over Paki TV”, was the logic provided by Mr. Khatarnak.

The lead actor of NarBali: Way ahead of Indian Bahu Bali who had just two Baahus (hands) while Nar Bali has many Baahus
The lead actor of NarBali: Way ahead of Indian Bahu Bali who had just two Baahus (hands), while Nar Bali has many Baahus

Hafiz had already decided that the movie consists two parts much like the Indian original, but the story will be in future, a deviation from Bahubali, which had a story in past. War scenes would be shot live, while drones are killing innocent shepherds of Afghanistan. One major deviation in the story will be there would be two war scenes.

In the first part of Narabali, Taliban would be fighting and in the second part of the movie, ISIS would be given a chance. Highlight of the movie is supposed to be the war with ISIS.

First war scene will be in the mountains of Afghanistan, where young and energetic Talibs will be using AK-47s and other leftover armament of Americans. “But it is the second war scene that will be the highlight of the movie”, Dr Hafiz explained animatedly. “In fact, for this movie, I intend to do a thesis on war sciences from the Al-Kill university of Peshawar. As the doctorate would be awarded in a few weeks, I am trying to prefix my name with Dr”, he explained the sudden appearance of honorary title before his name.

It appears that lots of drones would be used in the climax in which, probably either Damascus or Alexandria would be decimated by using a variety of weapons ranging from missiles, tanks to those chemical weapons planted in Iraq by Americans.

Junior Bhutto has already expressed to play the romantic lead, with Hina Khar as his love interest. However, it appears, Senior Bhutto has not agreed to his son playing the role, while he himself was available. “It’s all in the family and we have a way to settle family disputes. Whoever is alive as on the day of shooting, will play the role”, Dr Hafiz explained.

“Don’t think there will not be any Indian connection– One can only take Pakistan out of India, but it is not possible to take India out of Pakistan”, Col. Khatarnak said, “One finalized casting was “Asiya Andrabi” who will be standing near a torn up Pakistani flag with Paki national anthem in the background. But the one is suspense”. However, when a bottle of Chivas Regal was offered, he blurted out. It is none other than our own “Diggi Raza” in the get up of “Manthari Kaka” of Saudagar fame. When asked how it is possible to shoot Asiya Andrabi, who lives in Srinagar, Hafiz laughed at us. “Any woman in burqa can do that role. We just use her name in titles”, he explained pitying at our doubts. However, Diggi Bhai will be coming to Iraq, where a major portion of the movie would be filmed. With Dawood and Memon as producers, he was confident that budget would not be a constraint for them.

When the news of this was broken out, there was a sudden rush of buyers for international rights. For Indian territory, there was a fierce competition but finally Salman Khan lost to Owaisi brothers, who pledged a whopping $100M.

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