Monday, 23rd April, 2018

N Srinivasan to demand a separate state called Madras Cafe

24, Aug 2013 By vivekjain

Encouraged by the success of the Telangana movement, the boss of Indian cricket, N Srinivasan, fondly known to all as Srini Mamu, has decided to demand a new state.

Sources indicate that Mamu is planning to launch a political party from the Chepauk stadium in Chennai. The party will be called AIMCSK – All India Mamu’s Chennai Super Kings.

We contacted Mr. Srinivasan and this is what he had to said – “I have done nothing wrong. I have given myself a clean chit!”.

On being reminded that we were actually looking for his statement on the new state, Madras Cafe, he said, “Oh, I see. You see, DMK and AIADMK have ruled this state with an iron-fist for decades. This kind of exclusivity cannot be tolerated. It is time for me to get my chance, given my rich experience in BCCI politics. I have it all planned out. Dhoni will be our Home Minister while Gurunath (my son-in-law) will be our Sports Minister. We will also have a new ministry which will be a first of its kind initiative in India. This will be called – ‘clean chit’ ministry and obviously, it will be under me directly!”

When inquired about the choice of name, Madras Cafe, Srini said that this is a tribute to the famous South Indian eatery in Delhi where he regularly hangs out with Gurunath and Vindoo.

Moreover, it is so much in the news that we would not need to spend money on publicity. We had to choose one of two names – Madras Cafe or Chennai Express. “I don’t like SRK personally  so we ruled out Chennai Express. But just to be fair, we’ve roped in Deepika as our brand ambassador”.

We also tried to get reactions from the the political spectra. We contacted Mr. Rahul Gandhi who said, “If India is a Mobile phone, Congress is Nokia”. We are still trying to decipher what that means.

But Mr. Sanjay Jha, the Congress spokesperson offered a ready explanation – “Isn’t it obvious?  Don’t you read by blog? Nokia is as secular as it gets. While Modi is like iPhone, creating divisions in the society. Vote for Rahul Ji!” Digvijay Singh had a unique  and insightful perspective as usual. He said, “Srini is a state enthusiast!”

Sources, tell us that if things don’t work out as planned, Srini will meet the PM directly. He knows, all he needs to do is to ask the question and the answer will be “Theek hai!”