Sunday, 22nd October, 2017

Groundbreaking research proves that watching CID lowers IQ

18, May 2015 By potato

Mumbai. A recent groundbreaking study done by psychologists at Princefun Institute of Scientific Studies(PISS), proved the already hypothesized theory that watching the popular Indian crime investigation series called CID, i.e., Crime Investigation Department lowers the IQ of the person watching it.

Low IQ ka matlab samajhate ho Daya!
Low IQ ka matlab samajhate ho Daya!

Residents across the country have outraged and demanded government compensation for their loss of intelligence. Various facebook pages have also been made, with the aim to pressurize the government into banning studies done at the prestigious PISS.

Maharashtrians have demanded special reservation in public colleges as they claim that the program affected them the most. The real CID has clarified their position in a press conference held today at 10:30 A.M.. Faking news has obtained exclusive access to its transcript.

“(ACP Praman says) The CID is as shocked as the general public is, after looking the recent studies. We would like to assure the public that we do not follow any procedure shown by the actors in the fictional program ‘CID’. We have been bombarded with angry calls and e-mails by people who believe we are responsible for their loss. I would like to assure you that this is not the case. We have a strict policy that forbids our officers from watching the program and any officer found watching it is immediately discharged from their duties.”

With political parties using this as an opportunity to score points over their rivals, and an angry public that cant tell the difference between television and real life, there has been utter chaos across the country.