Saturday, 21st October, 2017

Fast and Furious made Auto-wallas in Metros go furious

06, Apr 2015 By sameer mahawar

Bengaluru. To add more to the driving skills of already rash drivers, Auto-Rickshaw Union of Bengaluru city decided to take their employees to a highly intensifying movie show ‘Fast & Furious 7’. The ticket prices were very high but couldn’t touch the heights of auto fares they charge exorbitantly from innocent commuters.

One of the auto driver raised his voice that how can such high price could be charged for a 130 minute short duration film. He got a refuting reply from a mango-man standing in the queue, “If you can rob our pockets for short distance travel, why can’t they charge such amount, which in any means is lesser than the fares you charge”. Auto-walla could do nothing but nodded to this what-could-be said as an accurate reply.

Auto-wallas not impressed with Vin Diesel in Fast and Furious 7, arguing their autos run on CNG, not on diesel.
Auto-wallas not impressed with Vin Diesel in Fast and Furious 7, arguing their autos run on CNG, not on diesel.

When the action scenes started in the movie, the whole lot of audience, apart from auto-wallas, started hooting and whistling. Seeing this kind of expression on their poker face it was founded that these action scenes were nothing but a daily job for them. “Such kind of driving is amateur level thing for us” said a 19 year old driver.

“The way we accelerate and brake, the way we tamper the meter to run at lightning fast speed, the way we dodge the traffic coming onto our way, the way we swear people to get them out of our way and the way we take passengers to their destination by taking the shit out of them is much more electrifying than the poor skills shown in movie. Such driving is a disgrace to all metro-cities auto drivers”, said another auto-walla who seemed to be in his mid 50s. He has already written to Vin Diesel to refund back the ticket money as compensation for the poor show. He justified his action by saying, ” Our auto-rickshaws run on CNG, so why should we pay for Diesel.”

We also tried to take comments from another auto-walla, Bhaiya Ji (who holds the Guinness world record of getting brozoned by female passengers for maximum number of times). He was very furious as movie was not upto his expectations. “The time for which these so called ‘Speedy’ cars were in the air was far less than the standard time his auto-rickshaw remains in the air when he jumps off a speed-breaker. Is this the class they claimed to display in past 6 season?” he said fumingly.

To control their outrageous behaviour, the President of driver union has forwarded a list ( along with some bribe- which has been funded from the extra amount of fares charged from passengers) of some ‘brilliant-on-the-road’ auto-wallas to the directors, who he claims can be given a role in next FF sequel so that their talent gets recognized worldwide.