Friday, 20th April, 2018

Ekta Kapoor says acche Din of India to end soon as they do in her serials

02, Oct 2014 By Parag Randar

Her looks conveyed terror regarding the oncoming Fate of India

In the wake of ongoing “Acche din” in India, with the Modi visit of US being highly successful and the economy stabilising, the Drama Queen of India, Ekta Kapoor had a different view.  In a recent interview with Faking News regarding the changes and the betterment in India after the Modi Government came into power, Ekta Kapoor said, “According to me these Acche Din won’t last long. William Shakespeare had said “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players”. Since I am the Queen of Stage in India, I say and quote; these ache din won’t last long. They don’t last in my makings; they will not last here, in this world.” After the interview she explained our correspondent her theories in detail (For her theories refer this link, “Pagalpanti/”).

All the housewives and home catering crowd of India had been utterly disturbed by these comments of Ekta. Minal a housewife in Bandra, Mumbai said,”Ektaji is God for us. She has changed the way we think and act. During the recent Modi fest, everything was going so right. For quite some time now my “Entuition (Ekta Intuition)” constantly nudged me that some twist awaited us around the corner. And since Ektaji has confirmed the same now, I have absolutely no doubt that these “Ache Din will end soon.” Poor Minal was sobbing heavily during the entire conversation.

Faking News reached Lalu Yadav for getting his views on this issue. In his much loved Bihari Accent he said, “ Humm Ektaji Ki Taraf Humara Pura Samarthan Jatate hai.” He narrated to faking news how Rabridevi told him about the prophecy of Ekta Kapoor and that how she believes ekta is right, citing lalu yadav’s health problems as early indications of the possible oncoming disasters.

While talking to Arvind Kejriwal, he said, “If my Party would have come into power, This would never have happened. We would never have brought Acche Din in the first place, and this threat that the Aacche Din won’t last long would never have arised.”

Meanwhile All Babas Coalition of India (popularly known as “ABC of India”) had an urgent meeting which was  followed by a press conference, for designing and communicating measures for combating this problem. Also people across India have started to conduct “Puja and Havans” to avert the consequences of the prophecy. Housewives like Minal, have already started their household measures, including tying black dolls, or aversing bad eye with the help of Lemon and Green Chillies. This has led to a great surge in the prices of Lemon and green chillies.

In a fleeting 2 minutes interview with Nirmalbaba, he said,” I have been a follower of Ekta for a very long time. In fact it is her serials had led to the spiritual awakening in me. I didn’t doubt her for a second when Mihir in “Kyuki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi” was back from his grave for the 7th time and I don’t doubt her even now. We have to tackle this problem head-on, or it is our life that is on stake. Listening to his comments, all his devotees were on their edge. People, especially housewives, are out on the streets, carrying slogans like “Repent: There is still time.”,” Do all you can to please Ektaji, may be she will spare us.” The police were unable to control the crowd as they themselves were a part of the groups.

While people in Tamil Nadu, agreed to Ekta views, and considered Jayalalitha’s sentence to be one of the early symptoms of this yet to come calamity, people in the other parts of India feared her bail, which they claim would be a bigger disaster. Some in Maharashtra believe  breaking of NDA and Sena alliance is as an example of the materializing of Ekta’s prophecy .

Scientists all over India, are getting themselves ready for any possible disaster that may come. While talking to a India medical scientist, he said, ”The world may not know this, but we have developed cure for Eubola. After hearing Ektaji’s views, we scientists have not been able to sleep, and the desperation of getting ready for any outbreak, in the wake of Ektaji’s warnings, we have developed vaccine for Eubola.

Following Ekta Kapoor comments, the security officials of Modiji, have tightened his security measures and all his meetings and activities have been postponed, awaiting further instructions from Ekta Kapoor.

Meanwhile Arnob Goswami had gathered a group of his supporters and has put up a protest in from of Ekta Kapoor’s house demanding that she should tell people, what exactly is the disaster that is posing a threat to India. While our correspondent tried to ask Arnob what he exactly demanded for, we could only record, “The Nation Wants to Know” before our microphone burst into flames due to his inhumanly high pitch.

Also many cases have been reported regarding domestic violence in the recent days after Ekta’s comments. What is so intriguing about these are the fact that, it’s not men, but women who abused their husbands. Talking to one such victim, who didn’t want to be named fearing his wife, said, ”I and some of my friends ridiculed the idea of Ekta Kapoor’s Prophecy and when we opposed Ekta Kapoor and her ideology in front of our wives, they used all the means necessary to stop us from doing so. I am sure Lalu Yadav also had such an experience before he supported Ekta Kapoor. This is so wrong…” tears welled up in his eyes saying so.

While people are awaiting for further comments from Ekta, who has failed to respond to our mails or make a public appearance, all over India, people have started watching all of the Balaji Telefilms Soap Serials looking for clues as to what might be the disaster that India is facing.