Reports coming in from IIM campuses across the country suggest that several Investment Banks have decided to stop hiring from B-Schools and instead, are shifting their hiring focus to graveyards.
This is reportedly because most B-Schoolers tended to become zombies after working 100 hour weeks at I-Banks anyway and the firms wanted to save time and training cost on the “zombification learning curve.”
“From ten I-Banks coming for placements last year, we now just have two coming,” Pankaj Chauhan, the placement convenor at IIM-A said. “And even the ones that are coming are behaving strangely.”
Even the few I-Banks that did come to B-school campuses for placement tried to recruit people who were already zombie-like in their behavior and bearing.
“I went into the interview and they asked me to impersonate a zombie, walk listlessly from one end of the room to the other and growl lazily at them,” Deepak Chaurasia, an IIM-B student who had applied for one of the I-Banks said. “They were really impressed when I tried to bite one of their old looking senior partners.”
“This is my dream company and leave alone impersonating a zombie, I am willing to have relations with a male camel to get through,” Mr. Chaurasia added pensively. “I really hope I get through.”